She was honest in her response. I believed her. “Honestly, I cannot with all sense of truth, claim that I set out on a mission to write poems. I write poems because it gives me the freedom to express myself.
“It could be about anything, it could rhyme, or not rhyme, it could follow a certain pattern or just a verse. I simply write from the depth of my mind.”
I thought she was just a poet until she said, “I have written articles that have been published in magazines. So, I cannot say I am limited to writing only poems. My fourth book, “From Trauma to Triumph: Finding Liberty” is not poetry.”
She is correct. But even that book is written with the touch of poetry. What does poetry mean to you? It was a question she probably knew I would ask. Her answer was not immediate. But when it came, it was deep; and musical. She offered me a completely different meaning of poetry—several versions.
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Here she is: “Poetry is the mirror of our soul. It reflects the music of the universe. Poetry gives me a deep understanding of language and an intense connection with nature to better express my ideas.
“Is it not simply incredible how a line or stanza of a poem could encapsulate an entire story? I find it absolutely captivating how emotions and feelings can be compressed into few words.
“With poems, there is no disconnect. Gaps are created not by what is said, but by how it is said. What is said reaches the mind; how it is said reaches the heart. For me, there is no way to win the mind, without first winning the heart.
“Based on my life’s experiences, there is no doubt that words are powerful. Just as they could hurt when used wrongly, words also have the power to soothe, to heal, to repair, to rebuild what has been damaged.
“There is a right way to use words, and that for me, has been found through writing poems. Words are a flaming torch, which in the hands of a master can light the way, but which in the hands of a maniac, can scorch the earth.
“Poetry is fluidity of movement. I could say, from my little experience that poetry is beauty in motion.
“For me, every step I take echoes a melody, a rhythm, a magic of its own. It helps, quite a lot I might add, about a certain gift of intuitiveness that guides me to find the exact words I need to create balance and rhyme.”
Reading her poems has constantly revealed or whispered something to my intellect. It is something she wouldn’t talk about; but which she cannot hide from her writings. It feels like a pain in the past—something gruesome but which she has either escaped from or she’s trying to.
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She explained a bit of this when asked what colours her writings: “My writing is flavoured by my experiences.” At this point, her voice goes low, her countenance is as though she is fighting tears. Uninterrupted, she continues; sounding more poetic:
“From the tiniest details to the most dramatic events. In typically sensitive style, I let my words flow unrestrained. I invite all into a new realm of strength, igniting hearts with passion, breaking apart the chains of hate, and welcoming the wounded.
“So, when my path crosses with yours, your pain becomes mine—our collective loss; just as my joy becomes yours. Since I care, like you care, we find solace for ‘our’ loss.
“Our friendship supports the loss and the pain we individually bear, lessening its sting. There is a fellowship among those who know the pain of suffering. For the world is filled with much that nobody’s heart should bear alone.
“I would like to believe that my poems address the emotional, the spiritual, the psychological and the physical aspects of humanity.
“I would also like to believe that people will read my poems and see the light beyond the darkness, see hope above the despair, courage in the midst of battles, strength that overcomes weaknesses, and faith that triumphs over their fears.
“As I share my gift of writing, I remember the quote by Thomas Paine: “Give to every other human being every right that you claim for yourself.”
“In the light of that, I would like my poems to offer healing to the scars on the psyche of those bound in the shackles of oppression, subjugation, depression—and courage in their desperate search for freedom.”
Quite a strong message. Uboho, meaning liberty, sees poetry even in the clothes she wears. Her entire life is poetic. She takes it in phases. Her expressions are short and crispy. She doesn’t waste words. I asked her: how do you see what to write about?
This was not an interview. I was on a journey. She saw me as a sinner who must be converted and led to the altar of poetry. She asked me to look around. As I turned, she excitedly exclaimed “poetry is everywhere.”
With her eyes radiating inexplicable feeling of discovery, she continued. “We cannot evade its allure. It is in the nature surrounding us. It is in the relationships and associations we keep. It is in the ties of family and in the bond of authenticity of our personalities. It is in the practice of architecture, engineering, and design.
“Poetry is a voice of reason to humanity. It calls us to re-evaluate what we see as differences. It makes us see that we are not so different as we think, especially as we share a host of human emotions such as love, pain, grief, friendships, hardships, happiness, doubts, and fears.
“In a world faced daily with different forms of conflicts, poetry can serve as conscience of the society. Poetry, if we allow it and embrace it, offers us a way to empathize with other people’s frailties.
“In its simplicity, poetry is a counsellor. It is the heart attuned to personal suffering, helping others to heal from their pains.
“In its complexity, poetry is an artist painting on a canvas, a carver working on a sculpture, a musician singing a love song, or a composer that conducts an orchestra.
“In its spirituality, poetry is a priest ministering to the conscience of society. In its audacity, poetry is the graceful motion of a surfer riding high waves, the delicate poise of a ballet dancer, and the majestic leap of a whale from the oceans.”
Then she went political: “It was the voice of poetry from Amanda Gorman that sparked a renewal of faith in the democratic structures of the American Government during the last Presidential Inauguration.
“Her Poem entitled, The Hill We Climb, forged new bonds of patriotism and strengthened the ties of unity, inspiring hope, rebuilding trust, restoring faith, and healing a nation on the threshold of a divisive era.
“It is poetry that gives me the liberty to explore the power of my imagination. Poetry helps us to understand one another. It is a vehicle leading us away from abuse to appreciation, to understanding and welcoming diversity, from hate to love, from violence to mercy and acceptance.
“It is also a graceful bridge of change that we travel on during our short lives, hopeful for the next destination.
“The literary impact of poetry cannot be over-emphasized. Literature has continued to play a major role in defining the art of linguistic expression. Its importance and relevance have not diminished since the times of Shakespeare.”
To Uboho, poetry permeates cultures and traditions as dance, masquerades, folklore, folksongs, folktales, proverbs, parables, ballads, hymns, drums, and various musical and artistic instruments.
With a huge smile of satisfaction, this unsung poet said as-a-matter-of-fact that “poetry distils into the expressive language of our artefacts, our belief system, keeping new generations in touch with their ancestral inheritance.”
I was not through yet. She equally seemed to enjoy our small talk. What does it mean and how does it feel to be a poet? That was my next question. The answer came as though it was prepared before time. That will be in part three.
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An Open Letter To President Muhammadu Buhari
By Stella Omonigho
Your Excellency Sir,
I am writing this letter with so much pain in my heart because of the state of our dear nation Nigeria under your leadership and watch. You will recall that when you came into power on the 29th of May 2015 Nigerians were hopeful that your administration was going to strengthen our young democracy and ensure that the dividends of democracy accrue to all Nigerians irrespective of their ethnicity, religion or party affiliations.
Before I continue Sir, kindly permit me to define the term democracy under which Nigeria is supposed to operate politically as a democratic country so as to remind myself constantly to remain within the scope of democracy as I address this letter to the Father of the Nation in order not to be faulted or accused of being undemocratic.
According to Pennock (1979:7), Democracy is: The government by the people where liberty, equality and fraternity are secured to the greatest possible degree and in which human capacities are developed to the utmost, by means including free and full discussions of common problems and interests.
Weale (1999:14) opined that in a democracy, important public decisions on questions of law and policy depend directly or indirectly upon public opinion formally expressed by citizens of the community, the vast bulk of whom have equal political rights. Lastly, the common definition even known to a neophyte is that of Abraham Lincoln that democracy is the government of the people, by the people and for the people. Lincoln went on to express his idea on the subject matter by saying: “As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master”. Therefore Mr President, based on the freedom of expression provided by our constitution and by the system of government Nigeria has adopted, I write to you to express my fears, my pains, my disappointments and my suggestions on the state of the Nation.
Before you finally emerged the President of Nigeria in 2015, you were once the military head of state between December 31, 1983 and August 27, 1985, then you contested for the Presidency under the All Nigeria People’s party (APP) in 2011 and then migrated to the All Progressives Congress (APC) in 2013 where you obtained the party ticket for presidency and won in the general elections in 2015. This means that you are a man of great knowledge and experience in leadership, in political matters especially as it obtains in Nigeria. With this wealth of experience as a retired Major General, Nigerians voted for you massively hoping you will be the messiah to save them from insecurity and insurgency as you promised in your electioneering . We all believed in you Baba, that a young man Hashimu defiled all odds and trekked from Lagos to Abuja for 18 days to demonstrate his love, admiration and hope in you. Sir, below are some of the promises you made to woo us to vote for you in 2015 and since we saw you as a man with integrity, we believed every word you said despite some red flags being flown by some elders. These promises were extracted from some of your campaign videos and posters:
Ban on government officials from going abroad for medical treatment.
Public declaration of assets and liabilities.
Introduction of National Gender Policy and offer of 35 per cent appointment to women.
Increasing the number of doctors from 19 per 1000 population to 50 per 1000 .
Upgrading all Federal Government-owned hospitals to world-class facilities within five years .
Ensuring that political office holders earn salaries and emoluments as determined and approved by the Revenue Mobilization and Fiscal Commission (RMFAC).
Creating a Crime Squad to combat terrorism, kidnapping, armed robbery, militancy, ethno-religious and communal clashes in the country.
Amending the Constitution to remove immunity from prosecution for elected officers in a criminal case.
One dollar to one naira.
Constant and uninterrupted power supply.
NSir, contrary to the first promise made, I am aware that you have been going on medical vacation in the United kingdom. more frequently than any other President this country has ever had. On the 5th February, 2016, you took a medical trip to the United Kingdom where you spent 10 days. On the 6th of June you returned to the UK for medical examination and you spent 13 days, on the 15th January, 2017, you went again and spent 50 days, then on 7th May, 2017, you went on another medical trip where you spent 104 days without handing over governance to the Vice President in your absence as provided in the constitution. The medical trips have gone so frequent that Nigerians have lost count and interest in the numerous trips which we believe are not free or cheap. So many people in your cabinets also took various medical vacations sometimes announced but most times unannounced. This was totally the contrary of what you promised before coming into power. While the poor Nigerian cannot afford health care in Nigeria where you promised to improve on our health services, you Baba and members of your cabinet proceed on these trips even at the slightest health challenge.
Secondly Sir, there is a great upsurge of insecurity in the nation that killings, kidnapping, rape, bombings and various attacks are now so common that the media are almost getting embarrassed to report all and the police are now so ashamed to admit to which led to the denial of the recent bomb blast at Sabon Gari in Kano where the police claimed it was a gas explosion whereas eye witnesses saw the suicide bomber yet nobody was prosecuted or warned among the police force for misleading the whole country by this false claims. Parents sold their property, borrowed and some died to save the lives of their children who were kidnapped in boarding schools and on campus. Kidnapped victims of the Kaduna-bound train are still with the abductors. Innocent people are being slaughtered by the day in the name of religious clash and nothing is being done to stop it. Baba, this was not your promise to us in 2015.
Mr President, the cost of food has gone up drastically over 300% since you came into power as a result of insecurity. Farmers are being killed and the females raped and ripped to death hence most of them stopped going to the bush for fear of being victims. In some cases, some of them were kidnapped in their farms, tortured until friends, families and fellow farmers contributed to pay the ransom. Travelling on the highway especially in some places like Abuja-Kaduna way, Benin-Abuja, Lagos-Ibadan among others is a nightmare as travellers are kidnapped almost on a daily basis. This has affected productivity of traders so badly in the country.
Thirdly Sir, power supply has been so epileptic despite the increment in the electricity tariffs. Businesses folded up as some traders could not afford to run them with the high cost of diesel and other petroleum products.
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On the fight against corruption which was your main focus Sir, it has become an open secret that Nigeria has recorded so many cases of corruption in your time more than any other especially among your appointees and cabinet members. These ones have graduated from stealing millions into stealing billions and no tangible sanction has been meted out to them. What we see is a drama show either in court or during interrogation and at the end the cases are swept under the carpet and these thieves come back to contest for other political positions. Under your watch Sir, an individual carted away with 80 billion naira, another 1.5 trillion, another 117million and so on. This is so painful to us the masses who find it difficult to eat 2 square meals a day not to talk of three. Baba, all these looted funds would go a long way in reviving our economy and possibly pay back a part of our foreign loans. How can it be said that Nigeria was borrowing almost on a monthly basis in 2021, yet individuals in your cabinet are carting away such huge amounts of money under your watch? What will the world say about us?
Mr. President Sir, the story about public universities being underfunded, poor remuneration of varsity workers and fraudulent payment platform (IPPIS) is no longer new even in the global sector. While political leaders and appointees earn more than 50million naira monthly, a university professor which is the apex of academic qualification in the world does not earn half a million naira. No wonder some of your ministers talk to professors with so much scorn and disrespect, no wonder an individual in your cabinet asked professors to go and farm. It is so sad that not much value is placed on education in Nigeria. Incessant strike and industrial actions by varsity workers because of failure of your government to fulfil agreement reached with the unions have led to constant closure of the university campuses and unrest of the youths in recent years while we see on social media pictures of graduation of the children of our political leaders who schooled in foreign universities while the children of those who voted for you are perpetually at home.
In line with the aforementioned Sir, while reminding you of areas where seeming failure has been recorded, permit me to make some suggestions on how to correct some of these anomalies before it is too late if not too late. As the adage says, “it is better late than never” . Mr. President Sir, posterity will remember your tenure for either good or bad. There is therefore an urgent need for a restructure in your cabinet; political appointments into various public offices must be reviewed based on merit and not sentiments irrespective of the person’s political, religious or ethnic affiliation. There is a great need to put a round peg in a round hole, that is to say that only those who are genuinely qualified and concerned about the developments and security of the nation should be appointed or remain in office.
As the father of the nation Sir, the time is long overdue to rake all parastatals of every corrupt director, minister, manager, desk officers e.t.c. in order to save not only public funds that are being looted on a daily basis but also the face of our nation. Agencies established to fight against corruption must do so with all sincerity irrespective of whoever is found wanting (there must be no sacred cow).
Furthermore, security agencies such as the police, the army and the civil defence must not hesitate to prosecute any defaulter of the law, nor deny the reality of the state of insecurity o the nation.
Lastly, with the recent acrimony and misunderstanding between the two major religions in the country, there is an urgent need for you Sir to address the nation on religious tolerance and harmonious living among all Nigerians irrespective of any provocation. On no account must anyone take laws into his or her hands by taking the life of any Nigerian.
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In conclusion, dear father of the nation, President Muhammadu Buhari, save our public universities by meeting directly with the aggrieved unions especially ASUU, and meet their demands in order to resolve the long-ignored issues because the students are suffering, deprived and delayed in life.
I hope Sir, that you will graciously look into all these points raised with genuine concerns for our nation Nigeria and act with dispatch to save our country from sinking any further.
Long live Nigeria!
God bless Nigerians!
God bless our nation!
.Omonigho, PhD, is a public affairs analyst.
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New Thinking In Public Service And Administration
The Fourth Industrial Revolution has already become definitive of the twenty-first century, and the Nigerian civil service system cannot afford to keep struggling to key into the fundamentals of a new age that has transformed human sensibilities and ethos in many radical ways, from the way we work to the ways we organize our lives and existence. The public service is one of the fundamental institutions, across the globe, that has been significantly affected by the massive and radical digital transformations of human administrative endeavors. The challenge, however, and especially with a public service in a difficult administrative environment like Africa, is how easy it is for the public service to be caught up in its bureaucratic rules and processes in ways that deeply circumscribed its efficiency and service delivery mandate. This is all the more so for the Nigerian public service and her struggle to reprofessionalise as a functional institution while undermining her bureaucratic credentials.
This is not a light assessment given the predilection for an institution like the public service to be taken in by administrative traditions, and be fixated on a procedural mindset that is firmly opposed to change. Such a mindset becomes trapped unfortunately in yesterday’s ways of thinking and is immune from exploring the new possibilities available for making the public service a better institution for complementing the capabilities of the state to improve the well-being of humans. The vocation of the public service—the administrative principles, codes of practice, ethical values and knowledge systems—constitute all that shapes the future of the profession. However, what happens if the professionals are not looking up, and defining the conditions and circumstances that make for the continuous transformation of the profession? What happens, that is, if we refuse to conduct regular environmental scanning, deploy scenario planning, follow global trends, or interrogate the intellectual assumptions and theories undergirding administrative practices? Thus, with the shifting demographics, constantly evolving technologies, and environmental sustainability challenges, the way we lead, the way we administer, the way we solve problems or manage change, etc., are changing so dramatically now that any institution not willing to key into the innovative sensibility will be left behind. And, of course, the Nigerian public service cannot afford to be left behind.
The way forward is straightforward: it involves investing in new thinking. The idea of new thinking speaks about the capacity of an individual, an organisation or a state to assess and reassess current situation and future possibilities through a strategic framework that will enable the individual, organization or state function better and more efficiently. The idea of new thinking is conditioned by a reform program that is strategic. In other words, new think for any organization or institution combines strategic thinking and strategic planning to be able to face the future. It is this strategic thinking that allows an institution like the public service to rethink and reengineer its modus operandi and business model to become better.
The notion of new thinking presupposes an old one. And with regard to the public service, this old thinking template is represented by the traditional, “I-am-directed” Weberian framework that defines administrative business before the advent of the managerial revolution. This Weberian structure required from civil servants the requisite characteristics of anonymity, neutrality and impartiality, and an overall profile circumscribed by efficiency, effectiveness, integrity, accountability, responsiveness, representativeness, loyalty, equity, fairness, and so on. However, it is a system that is essentially hierarchical, cumbersome and acutely bureaucratic to effectively fulfil the mandate of good governance. As a migrated structure, the Weberian system arrived in Nigeria without its value foundation. This made it impossible for the Weberian structure to organizationally mature into fully formed and value-oriented institution. Thus, it eventually became a bureaucratic paradigm that became ultimately a bureaucratic culture that contributed to the underdevelopment narrative in Nigeria. This made it possible for the system to be hijacked by various personalities for selfish and short-term ends.
Transforming the public service in the grip of this old business model demands also that the reformer must put in mind that the transition into the fourth industrial revolution must also occur within what has been called the VUCA environment. The public service is immersed in a VUCA environment, characterized by volatility, uncertainty, complexity and ambiguity. These are four elements that are defined by the state of the world, decisions of government, and national dynamics. The VUCA environment is one that confronts the functioning of the public service and demands an engagement that enables the public service to confront the challenges and achieve administrative excellence in the process. This implies that such a public manager who will steer the public service through the challenges of the VUCA environment cannot be merely transactional, and operating with a twentieth century administrative mindset. It also means that the public service must always aspire to become capacity ready in meeting the challenges of governance and administration that the social, political, cultural and economic environments might throw up.
The public service, within a VUCA environment, is faced with the challenge of transforming itself within what is called a scenario. In administrative reform, a scenario consists of a starting point (an initial or alpha state), a trajectory (chain of steps or events) and a future (omega) state. A reform agenda or scenario therefore takes a state from the alpha point though a trajectory to an omega point. Within a VUCA environment, therefore, the public service is always finding itself in an alpha point as the environment keeps getting complex and challenging, and is always oriented towards an omega that is better able to serve the needs of the citizens. The burden of the VUCA environment, together with the imperative of the fourth industrial revolution, requires that the public service in Nigeria must be constrained by the demand of strategic thinking and planning. While strategic thinking is conceptual and initiates the search for imaginative strategies, strategic planning is more programmatic in the ways it formalizes the steps involved in transforming the public service.
In thinking and planning strategically, therefore, care must be taken to distinguish between creating a strategy and being strategic. On the one hand, creating a strategy is a process of translating a plan into a set of results. On the other hand, the act of being strategic is a competence that involves critical thinking. The argument is that an institution, like the public service, requires strategic thinking to generate a reform strategy that will move the institution forward into more optimal functionality and productivity. Both must be channeled institutionally to the most central process of strategic decision making. This is what allows the institution to either think outside of the box or even without a box to structure institutional imagination. Strategic decision-making is ultimately tied to an institution’s capacity to maneuver through the VUCA environment in order to perform better. Thus, to move the Nigerian public service system forward to an omega point of cutting-edge optimality that creates performance, public value and productivity, there is the need to bring strategic thinking to bear on the institutional parameters, processes and values in ways that generate strategies for efficiency and effectiveness. Here, we survey the significant areas that constitute the locus of new thinking for the public service and the transformation of its efficiency and service delivery capacity.
Since strategic decision-making is key to the adoption and deployment of new thinking in Nigeria’s public service, then strategic policy intelligence emanating from the irreducible developments in contemporary decision science becomes inevitable. Decision science has become a critical field that has integrated cognate developments from artificial intelligence, organisational psychology, systems thinking, machine learning, probabilistic modeling, scenario analysis, big data analytics, and many more to become a key area that the public service must buy into to push forward its policy intelligence that strengthen decision-making. Modern policy making that has taken cognizance of decision science will most likely possess nine fundamental features: (i) forward-looking; (ii) outward-looking; (iii) innovative, flexible and creative; (iv) evidence-based; (v) evaluation; (vi) review; (vii) joined-up; (viii) inclusive; and (ix) learned lessons.
Strategic decision-making in turn demands that we rethink the nature of government and of the governance space where this strategy would be deployed. This is the occasion for the open government initiative to create a Public Service 2.0. Open government is founded on the principle that government—not just its laws and policies, but the reasons and processes of decisions that generated those policies and the flows of money that fund their implementation—should be open to the citizens and nongovernmental agents. The idea of open government aligns the public service with the necessity of (re)creating public value(s) that will transform the quality of life of the citizens. Indeed, the joint production of public value(s) by the government, nonstate actors and the citizens places the public service squarely within the ambit of the New Public Governance approach, the New Public Administration, and the New Public Service approaches that place the active citizens at the core of democratic governance, and the center of service delivery by the public service.
No public service can operate within the imperatives of the fourth industrial revolution without transforming its idea of human resources management and the dynamics of the workplace. For example, the idea of remote working and specialist contractors provide an institution like the public service the capacity to recruit a global workforce and create incentives that increase employee loyalty and commitment, and collaborations that generate productivity. This gives room for the achievement of a better work-life balance deriving from freer time and flexibility to work. And facilitates the acquisition of “twenty-first century literacies”: (a) interpersonal skills: facilitation, empathy, political skills; (b) synthesising skills: sorting evidence, analysis, making judgements, offering critique and being creative; (c) organising skills: group work, collaboration and peer review; and (d) communication skills: better use of new media and multi-media resources.
Thus, even though institutional reform is inevitable within the public service system in Nigeria, such a reform must be constrained by the imperatives of new thinking that arms the public service system with the wherewithal by which it must facilitate its own transformation. This is how the public service can become not only world-class, but compliant with the fourth industrial revolution and the challenge of national development in Nigeria.
. (Being a paper presented at a seminar held at the Public Service Institute of Nigeria – PSIN, Abuja, recently).
. Olaopa is a retired Federal Permanent Secretary, and Professor, National Institute For Policy and Strategic Studies
(NIPSS), Kuru, Jos .
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Letter From A Falsely Accused Accountant-General
By Omoh Giwa
Dear Ms Giwa,
For dread of your scathing and satirical remarks on political issues, I have decided in anticipation of your nosy weekly missives, to respond in like manner just as you are known to run your mouth like a diarrhoea-plagued bowel.
There comes a junction in a man’s life, when he acknowledges he has bitten off more than he can chew. Such a man is left with a choice; choke or vomit but the real question is how do I vomit N80 billion? You might wonder why I cannot just cough it up or use a morsel of Eba or Fufu to get rid of this fish bone stuck in my throat? Things are never as they seem.
It is ironical that the self-acclaimed gatekeepers of integrity and discipline; after ousting and labelling the previous administration, corrupt and embezzlers of public funds, should be caught with our pants down. The irony is not in our criminal and ridiculous show of greed or the hypocrisy of our actions but in our gate-keeping. If you consider our allegations against my predecessor who was disgraced for the alleged misappropriation of 2.5 billion naira and my alleged crime, you’d be incensed all over again but you must allow me defend myself before you crucify me.
Though my compadres have not saved me from this show of shame, I refuse to sing like a canary or a certain director of the NDDC whose microphone was turned off forcefully over a meagre sum of 40 billion naira. My refusal to sing is two-pronged; firstly, I do not know if this is a test of my resilience and trust in my benefactors and secondly my accusers brought before the world, an 80 billion-count charge that I cannot seem to shake off or defend. I am saddened however, by the silence of my patron especially as it seems he is more interested in picking his successor to evade disgrace than saving me. Do you think I have been thrown under the bus and left for you vultures to pick my bones clean?
The wind of change that swept the nation and engineered the political awakening of the Lazy Nigerian Youth especially during the EndSARS saga is worrisome and I fear a threat to my political career. Will this be the end of my career that began after my Bachelor of Science in Accounting from the prestigious Ahmadu Bello University of Zaria in 1984 because some pesky meddling Crime Watchers cannot do the bidding of Number 1?
I have held several key positions post-BSc including Assistant Director of Finance and Accounts with the Petroleum Trust Fund and have never been caught or ousted with my fingers in the cookie jar as being ridiculed because I challenged the gang of self-righteous University Lecturers. To say I am thoroughly embarrassed is an understatement. Although I know this means nothing to my current position or even future ones (I must admit that my career is at stake if my mentor does not get his wish of replacing himself with a stooge hence I had to line my pockets for the rainy day) but I admit it looks bad on my resume and might hinder my back-up plan of international waters like certain Ministers of Finance and Agriculture.
You might wonder what my motive is with this communiqué but do not count me above rolling in the mud with pigs. I will not tolerate any slander to my name and legacy therefore; I intend to expose my detractors. This group of intelligent mafia, ASUU, is responsible for unveiling my misdemeanour as there are obviously worse cases of embezzlement schemes in this same country. I do not hear the same outrage I received for a mere 80 billion payout compared to the bigger fraud in Port Harcourt that has been fingered for 117 billion naira. What the syndicate of lecturers do not know is that those in glass houses do not throw stones (this does not apply to what we did to our predecessors as they were deserving of every aspersion cast against their names. Greedy and unrighteous Lots!).
You might think I am falsely accusing this cabal of lecturers but why is my name being smeared after I rightfully insisted (dogmatically if I might add) on the Integrated Personnel Payroll Information System? These supposedly intellectuals are after my hide because I caught them at their attempt to become ghost workers. They want to eat their cake and have it (which is ridiculous in itself because the average professor cannot earn half a million despite their claim of intelligence and brilliance) and we cannot allow people to eat where they have not sown hence our desperate desire to gate-keep the looting and restrict it to the inner circle. Imagine if lecturers were financially comfortable, who would play the role of the Independent and Impartial Electoral Committee?
If you think this is my only evidence against the wickedness of this mafia, consider that I also introduced Treasury Single Account, a pivotal bid to curb wastefulness and excesses (do not ask politrickians to cut down their excesses as you have no idea how difficult it is to be a public figure. We refuse to be poor like our counterparts in First World countries) especially in Federal Universities. These men intend to hold us by the balls and demand fair remuneration as if they were as conscientious as politicians. Ask these men if they can stay up all night (deliberating on money making schemes)? Do you think theorising and philosophising is on the same wavelength as politricking?
The impossible lots! So unreasonable! If only our inferiors will know their place and stay there, the world will be better for it. When they began their warning strike, they thought we would cave. They had no idea we had weightier matters of politics and power to consider so we mocked them privately especially when Baba said he was unaware that ASUU was on strike. So gullible they would believe anything. Issuing warning strikes as though they hold the real power. Like us, their weak spot is playing gods for a few weeks when they can collect their meagre share of the national loot, yet pretending to play hardball. We have not paid them since February when their warning strike began, the same way we didn’t pay them during the Lockdown when they also went on strike (they will learn to respect their superiors).
Anyway, there is a Nigerian proverb that says a child determined to frustrate its mother, will suffer too but I am struggling with the tumultuous choice of continuing my vendetta against the gang of educated rebels or accepting the slight. It is important to note that this might affect my international plan B. Let me know what you think.
Yours in Service,
Falsely accused, Disgraced yet Proud Accountant.
. Giwa writes from the University of Lagos.
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BREAKING: Kukah’s Diocese Under Attack, Two Priests, Worshippers Kidnapped